Yes, it’s true. Neither holySmith! The Mother, nor holySmith! The Father, nor any other relatives called to offer condolences on the recent death of Sadie, the last of the original three holySmith! Ferrets.
Judging by the fact that my website traffic from Missouri is way down, I am guessing that either a tornado finally claimed the holySmith! Parental Unit and possibly other relatives, or some other unforseen issue has arisen that would justify such gross, negligent behavior. holySmith! The Boy was all ready to tell Grandma what happened to his ferret. 🙁 Cheese and rice, Grandma. Think of the children.
Anyway, states such as New York and Texas (and I don’t even know anyone in either of those states) are sending more traffic to holySmith.com than Missouri in the past week, so I am basically making this blog post to see WTF is going on in Missouri, which is usually my #2 highest traffic referring location next to my current home state of Arizona.
WTF?, Missouri? WTF?, indeed.
Arizona is number one because I force people I know to go to my site and pretend to read shit. Missouri is number two because most of my relatives live there, and by the rules governing blood relatives, they must periodically visit my website and pretend to care what I am doing, even though most of what I write is total bullshit – unless one of my ferrets dies, of course. That really did happen. And so did my 300, like two years ago.
Seriously Missouri. Get your shit together. (And make sure to call my cell when you finally get a glove and get in the game already).